Hottie's Home
by spectre666
Summary: Many stories have been written of Ron improving himself.  This tale is about Kim's reaction to that improvement.
1. Chapter 1

Many stories have been written about Ron stepping up, improving himself. This story is about Kimbo's reaction to that improvement. As the tale progresses, the title will make sense. Enjoy.

I.

The lithesome redhead bounced at the window until her friend's hand halted her. "He's here, Monique, that's his plane." She announced nervously.

"Chill and still, girlfriend, you can't get any closer jumping up and down. He'll be here in a minute." Her grin broke out in spite of her best efforts.

"But...but...what if he's changed his mind, Mo?" Kim's exuberance left her, her shoulders slumped. "I mean, he's been gone almost as long as we've been BFGF. What if he..." Kim's eyes flared, "And...and that...that Yori! She was there the whole time! What if she...and then he...I...I..."

Monique stopped the rapidly escalating flow by the simple expedient of placing her hand firmly over her friend's mouth. "OK, Kim, CDAT. This is Ron we're talking about, right? Just nod, don't talk." Kim's head moved up and down. "The boy has been yours for what, fourteen years now? I really don't think a five week absence is going to change that. Besides, you've talked to him every week, right?"

"But just once a week," Kim mumbled from behind Monique's hand. "We're used to talking every day, every night, what if he..."

"Kim, you talked to him last night before his plane left." Monique sighed, "Did he sound any different?"

"Well, no, but..."

"No buts, just have a little patience. He'll be here laying a huge smacker on you in just a few minutes."

Kim nodded, eyes wide.

"Maybe that'll calm you down, or at least get your juices running for a different reason." Mo muttered.

"MONIQUE!"

Mo's glance sharpened as she stared past Kim's shoulder. "Never mind me, I do believe our wandering boy is...Whoa, mama!" Her eyes opened wide as her jaw dropped.

"What?" Kim whirled to look out from the promenade to the disembarking area; immediately focusing on one person. "Yep, that's my guy. Same messy hair, same cute ears, same...same..." Her expression matched Monique's. "What happened to him?"

"I don't know, but I have got to get me a BF and then send him wherever Ron's been." Monique whispered.

"Got that right." Kim agreed as she stared down at her returning boyfriend. Same sloppy sneakers, same baggy cargo pants, but the usual red jersey was missing. Ron was wearing only his mock turtle neck undershirt. A black shirt that seemed to her to be painted onto a rock hard ab and toned shoulders. "What..." Before she could continue, a man in a pilots uniform ran out and stopped Ron. "Oh no, what trouble has he gotten into now?" She moaned.

"I don't think it's trouble." Monique answered unnecessarily.

The pilot turned Ron to face the exiting passengers, like a receiving line. As the others left, some shook Ron's hand, some patted his shoulder, one woman with a baby reached up and kissed his cheek.

"I have got to find out the story behind that." Monique exclaimed. "C'mon girlfriend, we can meet him at the baggage carousel." Dragging Kim behind her, she headed for the exit.

II.

"There he is." Kim pointed, and began to edge through the crowd to her BF. Before she could greet him, a petite woman in a stewardess' uniform ran up, wrapped her arms around his neck, and pulled him into a passionate kiss. Ron's arms flapped like flags before descending onto her waist, whether to pull the woman close or push her away, Kim hadn't decided, when the woman pulled back. "Now, sugah, don't ya'll be a stranger, y'heah? Ya'll just come by any ole time and pick up your things, I'll be waitin'." With a final peck on the nose, and a soft giggle, the stewardess turned and sashayed off.

Ron stood, hands to his sides, mouth gaping, eyes wide when he heard a breathy voice in his ear, "And who was that?"

"That was Chantilly Lace, and that's what she wears, too." Ron said dreamily.

"And how do you know that?" The voice went from breathy to glacial in six small words.

_"I know that voice, somewhere I know...that..." _"KP!" Ron whirled, reaching to hug his girlfriend, only to be met by a strong stiff arm in the chest.

"Hold on there, buster, what do you think you're doing?"

"Uhhh...trying to hug my BFGF?"

"It looks like your GF just left!" Ron could swear there were emerald sparks spitting from the eyes glaring up into his.

"Ah...about that...yeah, see that wasn't at all what you might have thought you saw when you really didn't see it."

"What?" Kim growled.

Ron rubbed his neck, "See, KP, the only reason I know what kind of panties she wears is because I got a glimpse when I tossed her skirt up and took her stockings off."

**"WHAT!"**

Ron rewound what he had just said. His face paled, "Ah... I'm just shutting up now."

Kim advanced menacingly. Ron retreated until his calves bumped the baggage carousel.

"You are not shutting up, Ronald David Stoppable! You are gong to..."

"Whoa, whoa, time out." Monique stepped up to the two. "What say we grab Ron's bags and head for Bueno Nacho? We can get this all straightened out there."

Kim whirled on her friend. "If you think I'm leaving until..."

"Kim," Monique interrupted the beginning tirade, "the FAA frowns on blood and destruction in it's airports. BN is used to you two. Now come on."

Kim's mouth opened and closed, then she stomped towards the exit. Ron grabbed his single bag, and followed. Mouthing a silent "Thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you." to Monique.

II.

Sitting in their usual booth, Kim glared across the table at her boyfriend. Beside her, Monique tried semi-hard to stifle her snickers. Ron's eyes looked everywhere but at her, then settled with a gleam on the pile of nacos Ned had just placed in front of him. He reached for his first bite of heaven, only to have the tray jerked away.

"Talk!" Kim demanded.

"Ah, KP, they'll get cold, and you know how cold nacos are." Ron whined.

"As fast as you scarf them down, I doubt you've ever had to eat one cold before." Kim snipped, "It'll be a new taste for you. Now talk."

Ron stared wistfully at his cooling snack, then glared at his encroaching little buddy, "Rufus, if I have to wait, you have to wait."

"Rufus isn't the one talking here." Kim snapped. "Here, Rufy, dig in." She cooed softly, placing the order of double cheese nachos in front of the hairless rodent.

"minc, my pal" Rufus grinned, giving Ron a loud raspberry before diving head first into the plate.

Ron gave Rufus one last betrayed glare before reaching one hand back to rub his neck. "See, KP, there was this leak on the plane, and everybody was panicking, and I remembered.." He paused, "as a matter of fact, this is all your fault."

"MY FAULT?" Kim glowered, "and how is miss southern peach lip smacking MY BF my fault?"

"See, remember when we were going undercover at that swank hotel and the plane sprung a hydraulic leak and you patched it with a gum wrapper and a spare pair of pantyhose and it worked and everybody thought it was great and we still got the mission done and then we...huh..uh...uh"

Kim placed her fingers on Ron's mouth, silencing him. "Remember to breath, Ron." She chided, "Ok, so I remember the mission, what has that got to do with this?"

"Wellll, one of the hoses on the plane sprung a leak, and it was squirting everywhere. I remembered what you did, and I just did the same thing." Ron looked at Kim and Monique happily, sure that they would understand. "Now can I eat?" He reached for one paper wrapped goodie.

Monique was shaking her head as Kim reached to slap Ron's hand away. "That's it?"

"Well, yeah," Ron massaged his hand, "what else is there?"

Kim felt slightly gob smacked but knowing her BF, persisted. "How about how you know what kind of lace that...that..." she drew a deep breath, "What kind of panties she was wearing?"

Ron looked at Kim as if she had asked him whether or not he liked nacos, "But, Kim, I don't wear pantyhose."

"I know you don't, Ron," Kim managed with her rapidly declining patience, "But what does that have to do with anything?"

"I didn't have a spare pair in my backpack." Ron explained.

"Of course you didn't, so where did you get...you didn't?" Kim gasped.

Monique began choking, "You mean you knocked that girl down and stole her pantyhose?"

Kim's eyes began to fire up, "You mean she just let you take them off?"

"Of course not, Monique, I asked her for her pantyhose." Ron said rightously, inching his hand toward the nacos.

"Ron," Kim managed, "You said you tossed her skirt up, now how did that happen?"

"She wouldn't give them to me, just looked at me like I was weird or something and said she wasn't wearing any."

"And...?"

"Well, I knew that wasn't true, 'cause I could see her legs."

"Ron, what did you do?" Kim said from quivering lips.

"I needed a pair of pantyhose," Ron said indignantly, "I didn't know why she was lying to me, when I could see them on her legs, so I tripped her and threw her skirt up to get them."

"And...?"

Ron's surreptitious fingers had managed to unwrap one naco without being stopped. "And she wasn't lying to me, she wasn't wearing pantyhose." He began to ease the treat out of its wrapping.

"Ron..."

"Hey, she wasn't lying to me, she had stockings on."

"And...and...you stole them?" Monique managed.

"Borrowed, Mo, borrowed." Ron's prize was almost in his grasp.

"And...and then..." Kim quavered.

"I wasn't real sure what to do, I mean I only saw you do it with pantyhose, but I figured one stocking would do, so I pulled one of hers off, grabbed a plastic wrap, tied it around the hose, and the plane leveled out. See, all your fault, KP." Before his girlfriend could close her dropped jaw and react, Ron snatched his prize and in one massive chomp, pushed the naco in his mouth.

XXXXX

This was a suggestion from Zaratan, a plot he didn't have time to develop. Stay tuned for chapter two:

"Ron Saves Kim's Wardrobe" or "Beat me, Baby, I'm yours."


	2. Chapter 2

Hottie's Home: Chapter 2

I.

With Kim sounding like an out board motor, "But...but...but..." and Monique snorting into a napkin, Ron happily reached for his second treat. Kim recovered enough to grab his wrist, halting his culinary conquest.

"Hold it right there, Ron, this conversation is not over." Kim managed.

Sighing, Ron released his prize. At least things were looking up a little bit. Kim was now calling him Ron instead of Ronald. Looking into his girlfriend's emerald eyes, Ron launched his best abandoned puppy who's starving face at her. Kim's glare only deepened. Monique, however, lost it.

"Let the boy eat, GF. I can't take that lost look. Makes me want to either adopt him or call the pound."

Kim's shoulder's slumped. "All right, Ron, you can answer questions while you eat." Kim saw Mo's mouth opening, "But, remember, manners."

Monique mouthed a silent thank you, while Ron sent a wounded look her way. "KP, I always remember manners."

"Uh-huh, remember cardboard pizza at the caf?" Kim queried.

Monique shuddered.

"And how about the blueberry pies? Remember those?"

"Ok," Ron surrendered, "I may have gotten hurried on occasion, but I've told you before, KP, these are nacos, meant to be savored, enjoyed..."

"I gotta know," Monique interrupted his paean to Tex-Mex, "Why didn't you just use your belt?"

"I...I..."

"A belt wouldn't have worked, Monique" Kim explained, "The leather is too stiff, you can't get it tight enough."

"Yeah, see, I knew that." Ron grinned in satisfaction.

"Sure you did, Ron, but what I want to know, is what happened to your jersey." Kim asked.

"Chantilly..." Kim growled, "Uh...the stewardess has it. The stuff that was squirting out was all over it, and all I had in my on board bag was a tee shirt. She offered to wash it."

"That makes sense," Monique nodded.

"Fine,"Kim began, "but why the...when she...how come..."

"I think what baby girl wants to know, Ron, is why she kissed you?" Monique interjected.

Kim gave her girlfriend a grateful, although annoyed look. "Right. Well?"

Ron looked from Kim to Monique in wonder. "Ladies, this is the Ron man here, right?"

"Right." "Uh-huh."

"How would I know why the ladies do what they do?"

Kim and Monique looked at each other. "He has a point."

"Yep, totally clueless."

"Hey!"

Kim reached across the booth to grasp Ron's hand. "I'm sorry for jellin', Ronnie, It's just that I really missed you, and then that, that...and you've changed."

"Me?"

"You have." Monique asserted. "When did you get the bod', and how?"

Kim nodded. "Ron, you have really buffed up in the last five weeks."

Ron, to both girl's amazement, blushed brightly. "I...I hadn't noticed."

"What did they have you doing in that "summer school" you went to." Monique leaned forward eagerly.

"Just...just regular stuff." Ron sent a pleading glance at Kim, "You know, PT, classes, no sleep, no food..."

"They didn't feed you?" Monique gasped, "Now that is CAUP. What did you do?"

"Well, yeah, they fed me, just not much," Ron had a vision of the wizened old cook, "and what they fed me I didn't get much of." He frowned, "besides, sushi..."

Rufus' head popped out of a burrito, "Sushi..yuck!"

The two girls looked at each other, "Well, whatever they did, boyfriend, it looks good on you." Mo grinned.

"It sure does, " Kim agreed, "but what else went on? Did you see Yori?"

"Oh yeah, all the time. She's a junior instructor now." Ron said absently, staring at his little buddy in reproach. The huge snack he had anticipated had been reduced to a normal snack by his over bellied little bud. "Rufus, how could you."

Rufus groaned, looking longingly at the last burrito, and lonely naco. "Hink...sorry." He managed with sincere unrepentance.

"Are you sure you don't want those two too?" Ron asked solicitously.

"Nope, hinc, tried..." Rufus moaned in defeat.

"Rufus, you..."

"Never mind, Rufus, Ron." Kim laughed, "We'll get you some more after you tell us about your summer."

"Was Yori one of your instructors?"

"Oh, yeah, she taught me a lot." Ron began reverently unwrapping the last burrito. "But, she wouldn't answer my question, just giggled."

"And what question was that?" Monique finally broke the silence.

"Why her feet were so cold. I mean, I was sleeping so good when she slid 'em between my legs. Woke me right up, and you know how hard that is, KP."

Monique took one look at her friend's face and immediately shoved her out of the booth. "Rest room, now."

"But..."

"Now, Kim. Be right back, Ron."

Ron nodded obliviously, "Ok, I'll be here." He managed around the mouthful of bean, cheese, and tortilla.

II.

"Rufus, what is taking them so long? KP said "manners" so I gotta wait till they get back in case they want something. But I'm hungry!"

Rufus squinted one eye open in annoyance. Couldn't his pet see he was trying to sleep. "hic...dunno." He managed before his eye slid shut again.

"Maybe Kim wouldn't mind if I just..."

The crash of glass interrupted Ron's self questioning.

"You're paying for that, Sir." Ron heard Ned yell.

"I...I...I am not. It had to be defective glass, besides, the door is supposed to crash open, not shatter."

Something about the voice made Ron turn. He saw a Smarty Mart vested man, with an obviously fake mustache and beard standing amid the glass fragments. Ron dropped his head into his hands.

"You are so paying for that, sir, so give me your name and address, please." Even when angered Ned tried to be ingratiating to potential customers.

"I am **not** paying for defective...never mind." The slight man pulled himself upright, "I am **Frugal Lucre**, and I am here for my revenge. Mhwahahahahahah!"

"Sir, if you got some of the off frijoles we served last week, I'm afraid you'll have to contact corporate. That is still no excuse for vandalism."

Ned's failure to be impressed infuriated the slight man. "You cholesterol carting clown, Do you think I would eat in this place. Your food is overpriced, tasteless, and a shoddy replication of true Tex-Mex. Reason enough to destroy you, but I will take care of you later. The time has come for me to take my revenge on KIM POSSIBLE!"

XXXXXX

I know it's short, but gotta love the cliffies. (EG)


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3

I.

"Francis, give it up, you know this is not going to work."

The would be villain choked his evil chortle off, "Says who? I'll have you know..."

"Yeah, yeah, I know, "evil at bargain basement prices", heard the rant, skipped the movie."

Frugal Lucre finally focused on the mocking voice. "You! Bon Stippable! I knew Possible was here. Now I can finally have my revenge." He began his evil chuckle again.

"Okay, that's it." Ron stood up from the booth. "Three things. Number one, my name is Ron Stoppable. It's not that hard to remember. Number two, since when did you get big on the revenge thing, I thought you were in it strictly for the money. Number three, we don't waste Kim's time on the C list villains, and last, nobody knocks Bueno Nacho and gets away with it."

"That's four things." Frugal Lucre sneered.

"What?" Ron halted his advance, looking up at the ceiling, counting under his breath, "Name, revenge-money, light weight, Bueno Nacho...ah Diablo Sauce. Okay," Ron gritted, "four things. However you count 'em, you are toast."

"If it were just me, you might be right, sidekick." Frugal laughed, "But companies have sales."

He stepped out of the door to reveal four six foot tall gleaming silver robots. "You're the distraction, but while you may distract me, these will take care of the cheerleader. Mwhahahahahahah."

II.

Monique had one had on each of Kim's shoulders, both her feet braced as she attempted to halt the teen heroes exit from the rest room. "Settle down, girl, settle down. You know there's a perfectly innocent story behind that."

"Such as?" Kim growled.

"She...ah...well, she could have...ah...been on wake up duty and that's why she stuck her feet between his legs."

"HAH!"

"Don't buy that one, well, what about..." Monique began.

"She stuck her ice cold feet between my boyfriends legs!" Kim's voice, not soft at the beginning, was a shriek at the end. She renewed her effort to push past Monique.

_"Think fast, think fast, faster!" _"Ah, Kim have you ever had survival training?" Mo spoke desperately.

"Yes, why?" Kim kept pushing.

"Well, well, what do you do when it's cold and there are a bunch of you out in the open?"

Kim finally stopped, a thoughtful expression replacing her rage, "You all huddle together and sleep as best you can. You don't get much rest, those on the outside keep trying to get on the inside, and those inside keep getting rolled to the outside."

"Right. So if they were on a survival thingy could that have happened?"

"I suppose, but that still doesn't explain..." Kim's eyes began to sparkle again.

"Girlfriend, cool off, and let the BF explain. I'm sure he doesn't even realize he said something wrong."

"Okay," Kim said grudgingly, "I'll buy that Ron is innocent, but that doesn't let that Yori off the hook."

Monique nervously released Kim's shoulders and stepped back. "C'mon, GF, even if Yori has a thing for Ron, this is your BFBF, you know him like nobody else. Would Ron even notice?"

"Of course he'd...I mean, even Ron...He..."

Monique mouthed one word, "Tara?"

Kim began to giggle, "You're right, it would blow right past him."

The two teens began to laugh together when they heard the crashing of glass. "What was that?" Kim immediately started to go into mission mode.

"Relax, Girlfriend, Ned just dropped some glasses, that's all. Now, we're going to stay here a little while longer while you fix your face, and then you are going to go out there and listen to Ron explain what he doesn't even understand."

"You know, the fact that you can say that, and that I understand what you mean, should worry us. Is Ron rubbing off?" The two collapsed in laughter.

III.

Ron stared at the silver golems in disbelief, "Ah, Francis, you didn't?"

"It's Frugal Lucre and what do you mean I didn't?"

"I know you didn't come up with the scratch to buy Henchco's robots, so where'd you get them.?"

"If you must know these are Henchco robots, the 2000 series."

"Ah, man, didn't they tell you those things blow up when they get stressed? The lasers start going nuts and they just spin in circles." Ned began easing under the counter. "How can you call yourself Frugal when you buy that junk?"

Frugal looked offended. "I did not buy these! I traded my extra smarty mart coupons to Henchco's trash man for them."

"Okay, but that still..."

"And," Frugal interrupted, "I improved them. Who needs lasers when you have the Vortex 777 on hand?"

"Now wait a minute, that's the vacuum they recalled isn't it? Something about the vacuum taking the paint off walls."

"That's the one, they issued credit and told Smarty Mart to dispose of them, I kept them instead. My ma loved them."

Ron began to chuckle, "You're still living at home? Come on Francis, what self respecting villain lives with his mom? And that's your weapon of doom? A high powered house vacuum your mom loves?"

"I'll have you know I save lots of money by renting from my mom." Frugal began indignantly.

"Got to pay off the bond money your mom coughed up, huh?"

"Well, yes, but that was all a mistake. I shouldn't have even been arrested. As if I would steal from Smarty Mart." The store name left his lips almost reverently."Besides, I disabled the lasers after they took all the hair off ma's poodle."

Ron barely kept his giggles under control as an image of a bald Commodore Puddles flashed in his mind. "So what are they going to do? Suck all the lint off Kim's clothes?"

"Yes, plus there's more, but I'll show you. Number one attack." A compartment opened on the first robot's chest. A high sucking sound began, followed by a loud rip.

"Ah, man, not my pants!"

"I will turn these on Kim Possible! When I post the pictures on the Internet, she won't be able to show her face in public. With her disposed of, nothing will stop me, nothing!"

Feeling his boxers fluttering violently, Ron dove out of the vacuum. Only to have to roll back and snatch a flying Rufus out of the air. _"That's it! Nobody embarrasses KP!"_ With that mental war cry, he attacked.

V.

"You're right, Monique, I've got to learn to..." The two giggling friends strolled out of the ladies room to come to a sudden halt when a silver head smashed into the wall beside them. "What in the world?"

To their amazement, a boxer clad Ron was in the process of driving his foot through the chest plate of one robot while simultaneously launching an ax blow at another. Sparks flew around his sneaker clad foot, as his ax thrust decapitated the other robot. Using his embedded foot for leverage, he flipped over the sparking robot, to land in front of a hastily exiting Frugal Lucre. "Going somewhere, Francis?"

The low-priced villain looked like he was about to break into tears. "I don't understand. You're the sidekick, how could you defeat my robots? The fish net, the freon, the vacuum, the horn of doom, how?"

"Well, Francis," Ron grinned, "you really need to stop watching the anime. See, it kinda gives it away when your robot shouts 'Fishnet', or 'horn of doom'. Ruins the whole mystique, you understand."

"But the horn should have knocked you senseless."

"News for you, Francis, my mom yells louder than that whenever she looks in my room." Ron contemplated the hapless villain before turning to the counter. "Hey, Ned? You got anything you need done to pay for the door?"

Ned cautiously raised his head from behind the counter. His eyes swiveling between Ron and the robot torso currently being bathed in cheese sauce. "Ah, what?"

"Have you got some nasty job that would pay for the glass?" Ron asked patiently.

Ned's face bloomed in an evil grin. "Yep, the soured bean pot. The city won't let us empty it into the dumpster anymore and it's almost full of rotting, molding, fermenting beans."

"There you go, Francis, bean pot or jail, your choice." Ron taunted.

Lucre looked ill, but remembering his many cell mates, especially the mullet haired one, agreed.

At the restroom door, an uneasy Monique saw a look in Kim's face she hadn't seen since sophomore year. The Mankey stare.

"Girlfriend, are you all right? I mean, sure the noise was bad, but you said it was Rufus and Ron fighting over the last naco." Kim stood, staring, ignoring her friend. "Kim?"

"Huh? What?" Kim's eyes partially refocused. "What did you say Mo?"

"Nothing, what's got you all lost eyed?"

Kim blushed, "Did you see that move Ron just made? And that...that...he lost his pants!"

Monique studied Ron, one finger to her chin in judgment. "Not bad, but the boxers have got to go."

"Monique!"

Refusing to look at her friend, Monique continued, "A thong now, that might be an idea." She finally turned to Kim, "What do you think, Kim, blue or red?"

"Blue or red what?" Kim stuttered.

"Thong, girl, thong. That booty needs to be shown off!"

Kim's mouth opened and closed a few times before she managed, "That''s...that's my booty you're drooling over, mine!"

"Thought you were mad at the boy." Monique grinned.

"I may be angry with him, but he's still mine." Kim asserted with what little dignity she had left. "Ron!"

Ron turned to them, "Yo, KP, ready for some snackage now?"

Kim swallowed heavily at the tightly displayed stomach, "P...p...pants. Get some off...you...nice...GET YOUR PANTS ON!"

Ron gaped at his girlfriend before turning to the robot, "Wow, you'd think I never lost my pants before." He grumbled. "Hey, Francis, how do you get the bag off this thing?"

"So," Monique leaned one shoulder against the wall, crossing her arms, "what are you going to do now, Kim."

"I'm going to buy him a belt and a dozen new jerseys." Kim grinned back, "And tomorrow I'm going to see what else he learned in summer school."

"And if he learned certain personal things?"

"Someone, somewhere, owes me a favor that will get me to Japan." Kim growled, before going over to help Ron.

Monique's grin widened from ear to ear, "Oooooo, this is gonna be fun." She followed her red headed friend.


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4

I.

Kim and Monique sat in the living room of the Stoppable manse. "Okay, GF. What's the deal?"

Kim did her best to look innocent. "I don't know what you mean, Mo."

"Uh-huh. You got us out of BN, and over here so fast I'm surprised the swat team isn't chasing us."

"Ron's pants were too dusty to wear in public." Kim said innocently, "You were sneezing all the way over."

"A good reason the boy should have walked. I mean, it's not that far." She frowned, "And now we're covered in that muck. I have to go home and change before my shift. And a change and bath wouldn't hurt you either, GF. What was the hurry?"

"No hurry, I just didn't want Ron to be embarrassed in public." Kim looked away, her eyes looking all around the room.

"Girlfriend, our boy is about as unembarrassable as you can get." Monique's grin grew sly, "It wouldn't have anything to do with Bonnie and her posse pulling in would it?"

"Was Bonnie there? I didn't notice."

"Uh-huh. TILDCI, GF."

"Ah...what?"

"That innocent look doesn't cut it, girl friend." Monique grinned, "You just didn't want our queen bee buzzing around your flower."

"Monique!" Kim giggled, "Ron? A blossom?"

"Well, whatever he did this summer, he sure isn't a weed any more...mooore..."

Kim spun to follow Monique's riveted gaze.

Two little Kim's,the nice and the naughty, began dancing through her mind, _"He's ours, he's ours, allll ours!" _They sang happily, while Kim's eyes dulled and her jaw dropped.

"Hey, KP, could you do me a favor and go to Smarty Mart and get me a couple pairs of pants?" Ron's voice came from under the towel vigorously drying his head. "The stuff I had in my bag is dirty and my old clothes don't fit." The blond head emerged, "I know how you feel about Smarty Mart, but just a quick visit, please?"

"Clothes...Smarty Mart?" Kim finally squeaked.

"Please, KP?" Ron begged, "All I could find I could wear were these old cargo shorts." He gestured at the ragged khaki shorts he was wearing, "and they are about to cut me in half. Please, I'll even make a disguise mask for you."

Kim's voice failed her as her two little Kim's danced in her head, singing a bawdy version of "Let the Good Times Roll", complete with low cut costumes. "Wha...what?"

Monique snapped back to reality, disposing of the drool, "Don't you worry, boyfriend, Kim and I will take care of it." She snatched Kim out of her chair and toward the door.

"Just some t-shirts, some cargoes, and a couple of jerseys, please." Ron's pleading voice was cut off by the slamming door.

Monique hustled Kim to the Sloth, pushing her resistless friend steadily. "Okay, Kim, give me the keys."

Kim reached absently in her pocket, pulling her key ring out, handing it ..."Wait a minute!" The world snapped back into focus. "Why do you want my keys and where are we going?"

"Did any of what Ron said soak in?" Monique grinned.

Kim's brow furrowed, "He needs...needs...clothes! Right, clothes."

"And where are we going to get Ron's clothes?" Monique asked, with exaggerated patience.

"S...S...Smarty Mart?" Kim gagged on the words, "There is no way I'm going in there."

Monique laughed, "Not to worry, girlfriend, with my discount, we can get what he needs at Club Banana for just a little bit more instead of the usual wow worthy mark up."

"And why do you need my keys?"

"Let's just say I prefer to get there in one piece."

"Mo?" Kim growled.

"Okay, okay, but have you seen yourself when you see Ron?"

"What? I've been seeing Ron all my life." Kim said breezily, heading for the drivers door.

"Uh-huh, and what about that tight tummy, those hard calves, those to-die-for buns?"

Kim dropped her keys.

"That's it, girlfriend, I'm driving."

II.

"Monique, shouldn't we have brought Ron so he could try the clothes on?" A freshly scrubbed and dressed Kim asked her equally clean friend.

"Girl, as long as I've worked at CB, I know what size to get. But we do have a problem. The cargoes are easy, but we'll have to go to the sports store for anything like those jerseys."

"Ron only needs one, he can go to Smarty Mart himself for the others." Kim shuddered. "but those black Ts, go up one size."

"These will fit."

"Yep, and the pants, go up one size on those too."

"All right, Kim, what's that all about."

"Ron likes his clothes loose," Kim began defensively, "and those he had were too...too..."

"Tight? Form fitting? Showing off the Ron Man's booty?" Monique grinned.

"Yes," Kim blushed, "All that. Besides, do you want everyone to see?"

"I know I can't touch, but you mean I can't even look?" Mo teased.

"No!"

"So I can touch?"

**"NO!"**

**"**But it's all right if I look?"

"Yes. NO! Monique!" Kim took a few deep breaths, before returning her friend's grin, "Just use your memory."

"Ah, that's no fun." Monique laughed.

"That particular fun is all mine." Kim looked at her friend, "You were right earlier. We have got to get you a BF."

"Afraid of a little competition?" Monique giggled.

"Nope, just removing temptation, that's all."

"Mine or Ron's?" Mo teased before reaching for the larger t-shirts.

III.

"Alll right! A Boo-yah!" Ron exclaimed, before seizing Kim and giving her a light kiss. "You did great, KP, these fit just fine."

"Right size and all, Ron?" Monique asked, lips twitching.

"Yep, the Ron man likes a little room in his clothes." Ron smiled at his friend. "I know I grew a bit this summer, but I didn't think I grew that much."

"Just a late growth spurt, huh?" Kim questioned.

"Yep," Ron nervously rubbed his neck with one hand, "what else could it be?"

Kim led Ron to the couch, seating him between her and Monique. "Okay, Ron man, now you can tell us about your summer trip."

Ron's eyes opened wide in astonishment. He glanced at Monique, then back to Kim, a question in his eyes.

"Just the public parts." She mouthed.

Relaxing, Ron began, "Well, you know that Oriental cuisine is becoming big again, and that there are at least ten different schools, and that's just the Chinese. There are also a lot of variations in the Japanese styles."

"Never mind that." Monique admonished, "What kind of exercises did they have you doing?"

"Just...uh...just morning wake up PT, like all the schools and even the factorys do. Oh, Hey, I almost forgot." Ron scrambled from the couch and up the stairs.

Kim and Monique shared a skeptical glance. "He only did morning PT." Kim said.

"Suuure, he did." Monique agreed. "How do we get it out of him?"

"Never mind that," Kim's fists clenched, "I still want to know about Yori!"

Both girl's eyes turned to Ron. He was talking to Rufus.

"Ron!"

"Huh? What, KP?"

"How well did you...ah...get to know Yori this summer?"

Ron frowned in memory, "Well, not as well as I would have liked to. I still don't know anything about her family, and she never talked about them. Other than that, pretty well, I guess."

"Ooookay, let me try." Monique grinned. "How did you find out her feet were cold?"

"I told you," Ron looked puzzled, "She stuck them between my thighs."

"Uh-huh, and just how was she in a position to put her feet between your legs." Kim growled.

Enlightenment struck Ron, "Oh, ok, I see what you want to know." Ron stood up, "She could put her feet between my legs because we were sleeping in the same bed. Anybody want a soda?" Ron strolled toward the kitchen, leaving two gasping females behind.

IV.

"Ron Stockable, I will have my revenge!" Francis gasped as he carried the ten gallon pot out of the storage. "No one mocks..."

"Francis," Ned tossed some bags beside him. "put the contents of the pot in these haz-mat bags. When you're through with that, the environmental people will be here to take you where you can clean the pot."

"Haz-mat? For beans?"

Ned pulled a mask over his nose and mouth, "You can take the lid off now."

Francis grumbled as he grasped the tight cover, "I still don't see it. These are just organic..." with a seal breaking POP, the lid fell off, "Oh, my G..." Lucre fell to his knees.


	5. Chapter 5

Hottie's Home: Chapter 5

I.

Ivory teeth clicked together as a softly rounded jaw slammed shut. Emerald eyes blazed with wrath as the toned body leaped...straight into a soft pillow whacking her back into the couch cushions.

"Monique!"

"Just sit back down there, girl." Monique grinned, "I have got to hear this story and Ron isn't going to be able to talk too well with a broken jaw."

"But...he...and then...I just..."

"Do you want to know what happened or would you rather let your evil mind make up it's own story?"

Kim paused, "Well, I...he...what did sh...he do?"

"You mean what did Yori do, don't you?" Monique grinned.

"You're enjoying this, aren't you?" Kim growled, clenching her fists.

"Oh, yeah, girlfriend, you better believe I am. If you could have seen your face...twice...it just..." Overcome, Monique buried her chortles in the pillow she had just bashed Kim with.

"Laugh it up, geek girl." Kim's arms crossed over her chest as an involuntary twitch escaped her lips. "But just wait, your turn is coming, and I am going to revel in the enjoyment."

Just as Mo opened her mouth to reply, the doorbell rang. Before either girl could get up, Ron rushed out of the kitchen, tossing each a cold can of soda. "Here you go, I hope that's what I thought was upstairs." He rushed on past.

Monique looked at Kim, eyebrows raised in question. Kim returned a "who knows" shrug of her shoulders. When Ron returned, he was grinning broadly, carrying a large box. "The guy apologized, said that when he came by this morning no one was home." Setting the box down, he began to tear the tape off.

"Ron, uh, Ron?"

"Yeah, KP?" Ron ripped the tape off.

"About Yori..."

"What about Yori, Kim?" Packing peanuts began to scatter on the floor as Ron dug out box after box.

"How come, ah...why was she in your bed?"

"Wasn't in my bed." Ron reverently lifted a long slender package out and set it aside before tossing more peanuts on the floor.

"OoooooKay, then why were you in **her** bed." Kim tried valiantly to keep from growling.

"There it is!" Ron grinned triumphantly as he pulled a black box out of the larger box. "Wasn't in her bed, KP." He began placing the boxes on the coffee table, in some order only he understood.

Monique clutched her ribs, aching from suppressed laughter, when the grinding of perfect teeth became audible. "Ron...Ron..." she managed, "If you weren't in her bed and she wasn't in yours, whose bed..." Monique paused to cage a giggle, "whose bed were you in?"

Ron glanced up from his treasures, "Huh? Oh, whose bed? I dunno, some country place we spent the night at." He picked up the black box, opened it and took out two smaller ones. The smaller of the two he handed to Monique, the larger to Kim. "I didn't want my BFGF and my second best friend to think I'd forgotten them, so I..." He rubbed the back of his neck in embarrassment, "I just hope you like them."

Monique tore the top off her present, then froze, her mouth pursed in a silent whistle. "Wow, Ron...this is...this is just too much. I just...I don't..." Monique stuttered to a halt, her eyes never leaving the box.

Kim's curiosity overwhelmed her annoyance. Leaning over to look into the box, her eyes grew to match her friend's. "Ron, those are...those are just..."

"TGFW." breathed Monique.

"Whatever you said, those are beautiful." Kim whispered.

Monique reverently pulled two ear rings from the box. Made of old gold filigree, wrapping two black pearls in an intricate pattern. "I'm almost afraid to wear them." She sighed, then stood, reaching out to pull Ron into a tight hug. She placed a light kiss on his cheek, much to Ron's blushing embarrassment, before her eyes widened. "Kim!"

Kim sat watching her friend in bemusement, "What?"

"If he got this for me, his friend, what did he get you?" Releasing Ron, Monique whirled to stand staring down at the package in Kim's lap. "Well, GF, open it. I gotta see this."

Kim eased the top off her present, staring wordlessly at it's contents. Monique stood in front of her in silence.

Ron stood fidgeting for as long as he could stand it. "KP? Kim? Listen, if you don't like it, I can take it back. I'll find something you'll like. Promise. Just..." Kim's emerald eyes raised to stare directly into his brown ones. "KP, I'm sorry, I thought you'd like..." Ron's apology was interrupted when ninety pounds of redheaded girlfriend exploded from the couch, slid around Monique, and glomped onto him. Slim hands slid into his hair, pulling his mouth to join with two full red lips.

II.

James Possible turned his gaze from his daughter's retreating back to look at his wife in supplication. "Anne, would you mind telling me what that was all about?"

"What what was all about, dear?" Anne's smile could only be described as supremely satisfied.

"Now don't ask me that. You saw her walk in here, she didn't even notice Jim and Tim trying to shoot her with whatever that was they dreamed up."

"Oh, I think she noticed, Jimmy. After all, she dodged it."

"True, but she did it like she was sleep walking." A sudden thought jarred him. "Ronald came home today, didn't he?"

"Why, dear, how would I know? I don't think Kimmie mentioned it more than, oh, two or three dozen times this morning." Anne grinned at her frowning spouse.

Images of his Kimmie cub, her vacant smile, and the occasions her mother wore that same smile coalesced in Dr. Possible's mind. He jerked to his feet, heading for the door. "Ronald is going on a very, very, long trip."

Due to the last fifteen years of snatching children out of danger at the last moment, Anne's reaction time was very good. She slid in front of her husband before he could reach the door. "Now Jimmie, I'm sure Ronald is perfectly innocent. After all, Monique was with them."

"That's true, she practically carnied her to the door. But...but...I've seen that smile before, on you Anne." James frown became puzzled, "If Ronald doesn't deserve a black hole, then why would she be..."

"James! I'm surprised at you." Anne's face was as red as her hair. "You dirty old man, as if that's the only reason I smile."

His frown morphed into a wicked grin. "Not the only reason you smile, kitty, just the only reason that particular smile graces your lovely face. Speaking of which," James arched his eyebrows lasciviously, "What say we adjourn and see if we can make you smile?"

Anne smacked her spouse on the shoulder, before heading to Kim's loft. "I am going to see if Kim's all right. You..." She looked at him over her shoulder, eyes smoky, "You just hold that thought."

Jame's grin stretched wider as he watched his wife's backside flirt with him before she disappeared through the loft. "Life is good." He laughed.

III.

A reminiscent smile flitted across Anne's face as she watched her daughter. Kim lay on her back, propped against her pillows, clutching a box to her breasts. Her eyes were closed, a dreamy smile gracing her mouth. Anne jumped when Kim sat up abruptly, her hands clenched. "That rat! That no good, naco noshing rat! I'm going to...and then I'm going...boy," her eyes slid shut again,"can that man of mine kiss." Her head flopped back on the pillow. Only to bounce back again as she sat up snarling "I'm still gonna..."

"Uh-hmmm."

Kim's eyes bulged as she finally noticed her mother standing in the hatchway. "Mom! Ah, how long have you been..." She gestured at the hatch.

"Standing here? Long enough to know my daughter is having some real difficulties." Anne smiled humorously. "So, want to talk about it?" She walked over and sat on the side of the bed.

Kim sat up totally, Indian style, but still clutching the box to her breast. "Yes..no...I don't...Mom, I need help."

Anne's slim finger tapped her chin. "Let me make a wild guess, this is about Ron, right?"

"Well, duh, who else?" Kim was disgusted.

"Now, now, just making sure we're on the same playing field. What did Ron do that was so bad?"

Kim tried twice to say something, then wordlessly handed her mother the box. Anne's eyebrows rose questioningly before she took the top off. A low whistle inadvertently left her lips. "Kimmie! Where did you get...I've never...I didn't even know there was such a thing as red pearls." She carefully lifted the necklace out of the box. The string of red pearls interlaced with emeralds, joined and entwined with platinum took her breath away. "Kimmie, where,,,where..."

Kim reached in the box and removed a set of matching ear rings, along with a brooch for her hair. "Ron gave them to me."

"And you're upset about this...why?"

"Not that! I love the pearls, it's just that I...then Ron...and when I...and then he..."

"Calm down, Kimmie, one thought at a time." Anne grinned, "Now, since you like the jewelry, what did Ron do that was so bad."

Kim hunched into herself, her face reddening, "He...he...he slept with Yori, that's what!"

Anne sat back, "Yes, yes, I think that would definitely do it. Do I need to call our lawyer, or just check and make sure the ambulance picked Ron up?"

Kim glared at her mother, "Mom, what are you talking about? Ron's all right."

"OoooKay, lost me there. Let's take this one step at a time, Ron cheated on you and you didn't hurt him? I'm proud of you Kimmie."

Kim's glare turned puzzled, "Why would you think Ron cheated on me, Mom?'

Anne's hand came up to pinch her nose. "Kim, you just said Ron slept with this Yori girl. I assume Yori is a girl?"

"Mom!" Kim's face blazed. "Of course Yori is a girl. Why would you think other...you mean you thought..." Kim's face scrunched up, "Ooooo, that is just so...gorky!"

Anne stared at her daughter. _"If this keeps up, Jimmy is not going to be happy. I'm getting a headache!"_ "All right, if you don't think Ron sleeping with another girl is cheating on you, then what are you upset about."

"Mother! I said slept, I didn't say 'slept'! Wait..."

_"My head." _"Slowly, Kimmie, for us old folk, all right?"

Kim drew a deep breath, "Ok,Roncamehomehe'ssuchahottienowandhetookthestockingsoffastew_  
_ardessandhesaidYori'sfeetwerecoldandhe'sbuffedupsowellthenhe..."

"Halt! Time out." Anne's other hand came up to join in rubbing her forehead. "Why did Ron take this Yori's stockings off?"

"What?" Kim's mouth dropped.

"I really, really don't think I want to know. Not yet, anyway." Anne smiled. As she turned to leave she glanced back at her daughter, "Shouldn't you be getting the sleeping bag and pad out?"

"Why?"

"You did invite Monique for a sleepover after she gets off work, didn't you?"

"I did? I did." Kim swallowed, "Ah, did she say anything to you?"

"Just that she couldn't wait to see Ron's lessons in the morning." With a final smile at her dumbfounded daughter, Anne left.


	6. Chapter 6

Hottie's Home: Chapter 6

I.

When her mother left the room, Kim rolled over to pull her pandaroo close in a massive hug. She then tossed it at the dresser with a disgusted look. Her head went into her hands, "Sorry, 'roo, I didn't mean that." She went over and gently picked up the plush figure, setting it gently on her dresser. "I think I need to get a drink of water, calm down, and then call Mo and find out exactly how she took advantage of me to come over tonight." She nodded her head firmly. "Right. That's a plan."

II.

Anne Possible stared at her bedroom door. Things had been going so well. "He's smoother than he was in college." She mused as she absently re-buttoned her blouse. "One minute he's rubbing my shoulders and the next he's out the door. What started...Oh, lord..." What she had absently said to her husband echoed in her mind. "Kimmie!" She raced to the door.

III.

Kim straightened from the refrigerator, head cocked in puzzlement, when she heard the front door slam. "I wonder what the tweeb's are up to now." She thought, until her mother rushed into the kitchen, face pale and grabbed her shoulders.

"Kimmie, where's Ron?"

"Mom? What's going on?"

"Never mind that right now, where's Ron?"

"At home, I guess. He was pretty tired after the flight and was going to get some rest."

"Call him."

"But Mom, I just told you..."

Anne took a deep breath, "Kimmie, did you hear the door?"

Kim frown was puzzled, "Yeah, but what have the Tweebs got to do with Ron?"

"That wasn't Jim and Tim, Kimmie, that was your father."

"But why would Daddy..."

"I...I, ah, may have said something I shouldn't have." Anne confessed.

"Mother! What did you tell Daddy?" Kim recoiled in horror.

"I'm, ah, not entirely sure. Something about Ron removing stockings, sleeping with another girl..." Anne couldn't look at her daughter, "and I may have mentioned that you said he was buff and a great kisser."

The color left Kim's face, she looked like she might collapse. "Mom...Mom...How could you tell Daddy...?" She managed faintly.

Anne's face was as red as her daughter's was pale. "I was, ah, distracted at the time, but never mind that, call Ron and warn him."

Kim's hand reached automatically into her pocket, then she turned and ran up the stairs to her room.

"You'd think we didn't have a perfectly good phone." Anne mumbled as she reached over to the kitchen phone and began dialing.

IV.

Monique walked up the driveway of the Possible home, smiling to herself. What was little overtime compared to the fun she'd been having all afternoon. It promised to just get better and better with Kim's cluelessness and Ron's characteristic obliviousness. Luckily, one of the other girl's had come by Club Banana and mentioned she could sure use some overtime. A quick call to the manager, and Monique was headed out for more fun and games with Kim's mind. Just as she reached for the doorbell, the door opened and a person rushed by.

"Hi, Mr. Possible...Bye Mr. Possible." Monique stared at the retreating back. "O_h, this should be interesting."_

V.

Kim came hurrying back down the stairs, trusty Kimmunicator in hand. "Ron? Ron? Come on Ron, answer!"

Anne called to her, "He's not answering the phone, Kimmie."

"The phone is in the kitchen, Mom, he probably can't hear it from upstairs, but he should be able to hear the Kimmunictor Wade made for him." She stared at the blank screen until it began to

fuzz and focus. Without waiting, Kim began urgently, "Ron! Whatever you're doing, stop it and get out of the house. I'll meet you at..."

"Hinc...'lo."

"Rufus!"

"Hi, Kim-Kim."

The Kimmunicator trembled, "Rufus, where's Ron?"

"Hic..'leep."

"Well, wake him up!"'

" 'kay. " A banging came from the background. "...'scuze, door." The screen went blank.

"Rufus, NO!"

KPKPKPKPKPKP

I know this is short, but it will lead to some "interesting" conversations in the next chapter. Stay tuned for The Black Hole Turkey Shoot. (G)


	7. Chapter 7

Hottie's Home: Chapter 7

I.

James Possible was not a happy rocketeer. As a matter of fact, he was having serious thoughts about some how discovering breakthrough technology that would allow him to reach the nearest black hole. A sinister smile formed as he thought of the perfect candidate to test the drive; the occupant of the house he was walking up to. The blond occupant who had already, in James thoughts at least, gone where no man should go. James smile broadened as he thought of that long trip and even shorter stop. His knuckles came up to rap against the wood. For a moment, there was no answer, James was certain a guilty conscience was inside, when the door latch clicked, the door opening slightly.

"Hinc...'lo."

James looked down to a smiling naked mole rat. "Hello, Rufus, is Ronald here?"

"Yep, s'eep."

"Well, can you wake him up?"

A doubtful look crossed the pink face, "Try."

"Please do, Rufus."

"hic...'kay." Rufus scampered up the steps to his pets bedroom.

James stepped inside, carefully closing the door behind him. He glanced around the room, his eyes falling upon a framed snap shot. His hard gaze softened as he stepped closer. The picture showed his Kimmie-cub sitting, holding her scraped knee, smiling at the camera. She was bravely holding back the tears glinting in her eyes. Not so her companion. Ronald was kneeling beside her, bawling his eyes out.

James blinked, most of his anger disappearing in an instant. What was he thinking? Ronald would never intentionally hurt Kimmie. Whenever she was hurt, Ronald felt it twice as much. James walked over to sit on the couch. All right, Ronald would never willfully cause Kimmie pain, but, James frowned, he still wanted to know just what was going on.

II.

"Hello, Monique," Anne Possible said calmly, "You're early."

"Got off sooner than I thought I would." A gasping voice emerged from the tangle of arms and legs at Anne's feet.

"Got to catch Daddy." Kim wheezed, trying to regain the air lost in the doorway collision.

"Kim, I don't think so." Anne said, her words shocking her daughter.

"But, Mom, daddy will..."

"Your father will not hurt Ron." Anne stated firmly. "Now why don't you two get up and come into the kitchen. We need d to talk about this." Anne turned, walking calmly away. "And maybe Monique will make more sense than Kimmie." She muttered to herself.

The two teens untangled themselves, following the older woman to the kitchen.

"But, Mom," Kim immediately began, "You know Daddy will scare Ron to death."

Anne smiled her tranquil smile, "He might scare him, but he won't hurt him, Kimmie. You know your father thinks the world of Ron."

"I don't want Ron scared." Kim managed, "I want...I want..."

"You just _want_ him." Monique snickered, "Admit it, GF."

Kim's face would have done St. Nick's suit proud, as her eyes ricocheted between her friend and her mother.

Anne successfully hid her laughter, but her twinkling eyes betrayed her. "That's a pretty broad statement, Monique, care to explain?"

"Sure, Mrs. Possible, see..." a firm hand clapped across her mouth.

"You so will not!" Kim harshed. Shed removed her hand from her SBF's mouth, glaring suspiciously at her mother. "Mom, what is this? You were as worried as I was a moment ago."

Anne poured herself a cup of coffee. "Kimmie, I know your father. His temper is like one of Jim and Tim's rockets. It goes up very fast and either explodes or fizzles out. I think we can count on the fizzle this time." Her grin finally escaped.

"What if you're wrong?" Kim moaned, her head falling into her hands, "Daddy has never lost his temper before."

Anne joined the two teens at the table. "Trust me, Kim, Ron will be all right. Now, speaking of Ron, Monique, you were saying?"

Kim's head snapped up, a silent scream of NO directed at her SBF.

Monique ignored the flashing eyes and gasping mouth. "Mrs. Possible, you haven't seen our boy yet. He is just fine Looking like a contender for hottie of the month."

"Really?" Anne grinned back. "But what has he been doing? Did he tell you?"

"Not really," Monique replied, disregarding Kim's madly shaking head. "he said he was at cooking school and just did PT. But let me tell you, PT does not do that! And we saw at least one woman who agrees with us."

"And who would that be?" Anne smirked.

"A stewardess named Chantilly Lace, if you can believe it." She laughed at the name before continuing, "And I think she really wants to show Ron her lace collection, if you know what I mean." Monique's eyebrows wiggled lasciviously.

Anne scooted closer, ignoring the thud as her daughter's head hit the table, "Really? Do tell."

Monique leaned forward confidentially, "Well, it's like this..."

III.

James looked up at the thump that came from the landing. An involuntary smile twitched at his lips as he saw Rufus leading a stumbling Ron down the stairs. Ron's pajamas were obviously an old pair, the top buttons strained across his chest, and the pants only came down to mid calf. James watched with amusement as Rufus led Ron down the stairs by his pinky. Rufus' claws slowed his slide enough that he could maintain contact with Ron's half blind fumble down the steps. At the bottom, Ron automatically turned toward the kitchen. His auto pilot trained to get Rufus cheese.

"Ronald."

The blond head turned, eyes blinking, to face the older man. "Uh, hi, ah, Mr. Dr. P. Whatcha doin'?"

"Ronald, are you awake?"

Ron's face screwed up in slow thought, "No." He finally pronounced.

"Well, come over here, we need to talk."

Ron blinked, "OK, Dr. P., soon as I get Rufus cheese."

"Never mind the cheese." James lips twitched at the low growl that came from Ron's bud. "You can get him some later. I have some questions for you."

Ron's eyes made a vain attempt to focus before he said, "Right, cheese later Rufus." He shambled over to the couch and collapsed. "What did you need, Mr. P.?"

"I'd like to talk to you about cold feet..."

IV.

"Now that was something I didn't think I'd ever see." Bonnie smirked to her posse.

"What's that B'?"

"Didn't you see Kim when we pulled in?"

"Uh, no."

Bonnie's grin grew. "It looks to me like she got herself a new boy toy while the loser's away."

"Bonnie!" Tara glared, "Kim would never do that. Besides, Monique was with her."

Bonnie frowned at he best friend. That little item did tend to cloud her juicy tidbit. "Maybe so, but Monique wasn't the one with her hand on his butt."

Tara's mouth worked for a moment before the words formed. "She was just... ah...I'm sure she was just helping him into the car. Right?"

The girls sitting around the Bueno Nacho booth exchanged glances. "Riiiight!" They chorused.

Tara sank into her seat, "Well, well, I'm sure there's a perfectly innocent explanation."

The others looked at her tolerantly. "So, Bonnie, tell us what you saw."

Bonnie leaned forward, "I didn't see much, but what I saw was choice. I'm going to..."

Tara tuned out her friend, her mind seizing on one thought. "_Poor Ronnie, he'll be heartbroken, he'll be devastated. He'll be..._available!"

V.

Kim had sat at the kitchen table for over an hour, her mind fluctuating between thoughts of panic concerning her father's confrontation with her BF, and major embarrassment at her mother. "_I so can_'_t believe my own mother is learing about my BF's bod. She's way too old to think like that. majorly gorchy."_

The giggling duo stopped, all three women's ears perking up, when they heard the front door open A mad rush ensued to greet whoever had just entered.

The three women jammed in the doorway as Anne froze. Three sets of eyes widened as they watched Mr. Possible stroll across the living room toward his office. He had a small smile on his face, a chuckle was escaping him, and he was tossing something up and catching it.

"James?"

"Daddy?"

Mr Possible stopped his journey, turning toward the voices. "Yes?" At sight of their gaping looks, he glanced behind himself, then down to make sure everything was secure. "What? Am I missing something?"

"James...ah...did you...?"

"Daddy...ah...did you...?"

James raised one eyebrow questioningly.

"James," Anne began again, "Did you, did you see Ronald?"

"Yes."

The three women almost physically willed him to go on.

James mouth opened. He spoke. "Monique. Nice to see you. You're a little early, aren't you?"

"Um...Yes...ah...Mr. Possible. I...ah...got off early." Monique finally replied.

"Good, good, always glad to see Kimmie's friends."James resumed his stalled trek to his office.

Before the logjam at the kitchen door could formulate a response, he disappeared into his office, shutting the door behind him.

The three managed to separate, returning numbly to sit at the table.

"I gotta ask," Monique broke the stunned silence, "was that good or bad?"

"Well..."

"I..."

Anne reached for her coffee cup, setting it back down when she discovered it was empty, "Ah, good. I think."

"You think?" Kim managed to keep her shout to a low hiss.

"Of course, it's good." Anne asserted, before she hesitated, "I mean, after all, he wouldn't be that happy if he had just launched Ron." She frowned, "Would he?"

Twin "You're asking us? He's your husband!" stares answered her.

"No, of course he wouldn't." She maintained, stoutly.

"I dunno, Mrs. Possible." Monique pondered, "I mean, JWD, good launch, and all that."

"Monique!"

"I'm just saying, Kim. Maybe it went well with the rocket and everything."

Looking at her white faced, gasping daughter, Anne leaned in to her daughter's friend. "Not helping, Monique." She whispered out of the corner of her mouth. "Kimmie, I'm sure everything is fine. We'll just ask your father at dinner."

Kim's face twitched in revulsion, "Dinner? How can you think of food at a..."

"I dunno, Kim, I'm sure Ron wouldn't want you to go hungry, just because he's eating out of a squeeze tube." Monique snickered. "Do you need any help, Mrs. Possible, and what are we having?"

"Brain loaf." Anne smiled, "and no thanks, I've got it in hand.

"Brain loaf? Brain loaf!" Kim snarled, "On top of everything else that's happened, you planned on brain loaf?"

"Now, Kimmie, how was I to know Ronald would be breathing through an air line?" Mrs. Possible grinned.

"Mom!" Kim jumped to her feet. "I'm going over to check on Ron."

"I wouldn't do that if I were you, Kim." Monique quailed under the emerald glare that turned on her. " After all, if he's in orbit, there's not much you can do..." Mo wilted.

"That's right, Kimmie." Anne backed her up, "And if Ron is all right, he'll be over tonight." At Kim's questioning glance, Anne explained. "You know he never misses my brain loaf. He loves it. Sometimes I think that boy has a sixth sense or something. If I make it, he will come."

Kim's shoulder's slumped. Monique stood, walked over and began leading Kim out of the room.

Anne heard a mumbled, "Brain loaf, why does it have to be brain loaf." as her defeated daughter was lead away.

VI.

On the Stoppable's large, soft couch, a slumbering Ron Stoppable's nose twitched in rhythm with the nose of a naked mole rat on the arm of the couch. "Brain loaf..." He mumbled in his sleep.

A/N I want to thank all who have voted for this story, and our favorite SBF in the fannies. If you haven't voted yet, I think there's still time. (hint, hint :D)


	8. Chapter 8

Hottie's Home: Chapter 8

I.

"C'mon, girlfriend, enough with the moans." Monique frowned at her friend. "We need to decide what you're going to wear when Ron comes over."

A muffled response came from the red head buried in the pillow.

"What? Kim, if I'm going to understand, you have to take the feathers out of your face."

Kim raised her head, her face working like a baby denied it's bottle. "Ron's not coming over," She wailed, "Daddy sent him into space." She collapsed back into her pillow.

Monique's hands came up to rub her temples. Fun was fun, but this was getting out of hand. "Listen, baby girl, I know your dad is tops in the rocket biz, but the last I heard nobody knew how to build a rocket that could reach a black hole, right?" She leaned over and pulled Kim's head up by the hair. "Right?"

Tear washed eyes looked at her. "But...but...Daddy probably sent him to keep Frederick company."

"Well, that's not so bad. He'll be back in six months." Monique tried to reassure her friend. The wail that erupted almost deafened her. She immediately pushed the red head back into the pillow. Not much help, maybe, but at least her ears didn't hurt anymore. Shaking her head, she stood to examine Kim's closet. She stared for a moment, then shoved the hanging clothes aside, looking into the shelves in the back. She knelt and opened a few boxed on the floor before finally standing up, shaking her head in disgust. "Girlfriend, you are pathetic." She marched over to the bed, stopping with her hands on her hip. "Kim, where are your clothes?" She asked. The only answer was muffled sniffles. 

"Ok, time to get tough." Monique mumbled to herself. "Okay, Kim, just send Ron running back to Miss ninja knockers and her cold feet."

Kim's head lifted. "W-what?"

"When Ron gets here and sees you all puffy eyed and messed up, he's going to catch the next plane back to oriental hotness." 

Kim's eyes widened. "He, he wouldn't."

Monique raised one eyebrow.

A fire began to burn in Kim's swollen eyes. "He better not."

Monique nodded toward Kim's mirror. Kim slouched over and stared at her reflection. "Oh my gosh, he can't see me like this!"

"That's more like it." Monique applauded. "Now, where are your clothes."

Kim turned with a puzzled stare. "You can see my closet, Mo', right there."

"That's it? No hot little numbers hidden somewhere?"

"What's wrong with my clothes?" Kim demanded.

"Nothing, for saving the world. But tonight you're not saving the world, you're going to be rockin' someone's world."

Kim blushed.

II.

"All right, girls, supper time." Anne knocked on the hatch door. 

"Be right there, Mrs. Possible." Monique answered.

Returning to her kitchen, Anne was putting the finishing touches on the meal when she heard the footsteps behind her. Turning she looked a question. "Where's Kimmie."

"Oh, she'll be right down, Mrs. Possible." Monique grinned. "She's just putting the finishing touches on her ensemble."

Mrs. Possible grinned. "She's dressing up for a family dinner? My, my. Or has she decide a certain someone isn't breathing through a hose?"

Monique laughed. "She's still about half way convinced that Ron is flying with a certain monkey, but just in case..."

Anne leaned over confidentially, "Would you care to bet which he notices first, my meatloaf or Kimmie's outfit."

Giving the matter some serious thought, Monique finally shook her head, "Nope, no bet. That boy is an appetite on legs. I helped her get fancied up more for her than him, if you get what I mean."

Anne smiled in understanding. "Ron is a growing young man. Would you go out in the back yard and tell the boys that dinner's ready, please?"

"Sure thing, Mrs. Possible." Monique opened the back door, strolling out into the yard. She didn't see the male Possibles, but she heard some what sounded like voices from around the corner of the house. She turned the corner to hear clearly, "...One...Rockets are go!" A suddenly hyper active sense of self preservation turned her without thought to get under cover.

Monique winced as the dull roar began behind her. _"They wouldn't. Please, somebody tell me they wouldn't."_ She glanced over her shoulder fearfully, just in time to see the rocket reverse course, heading straight for her.

III.

Kim twisted in front of her mirror. The second skin jeans she outgrew last year, the peasant blouse with just a hint of décolletage, the subdued make up Monique had helped her with. _"Oh, yeah, this will work." _She giggled slightly. _"I hope when Daddy sees Ron's reaction, he doesn't rethink the space shot. At least, I hope Ron's reaction is that major."_ She continued to inspect herself, waiting as Monique had suggested for the proper moment to descend and "rock Ron's world." Finally satisfied, Kim walked over to her window. If she was lucky, she might see Ron before he arrived, letting her time her entrance more perfectly. Her welcoming smile disappeared when a dark haired form raced around the corner of the house, leaped on Ron in a welcoming grasp of such strength, both fell to the grass. Kim managed to close her mouth, silently congratulating herself. _"I'm in control. I am not jellin'. I am in control. I'm going to walk calmly down the stairs, outside, and then I'll beat her, and him, to a pulp." _Turning from the window, she missed the fiery cylinder that just missed the two flattened teens.

IV.

"Mmmmm, soft..."

Monique's head snapped up, her eyes glaring at the blond head that popped out from between her natural accouterments. "Ron Stoppable! What do you think you're doing?"

"Mmmmm, warm..." A wide smile and unfocused eyes answered her.

_"Would he even feel it if I went Pain King on him?" _A part of Monique's mind smirked in self satisfaction. "_The girl and the 'girls' got it goin' on, yes!"_ She sat up, her firm bottom resting in Ron's lap. His smile grew wider, while his eyes crossed.

"Ron," Monique began.

"Monique?" A feminine growl came from behind her.


End file.
